100 Things - Part 5 - The Final!
1. Since completing 400 things I knew I would eventually round it up to 500.
2. My worry now is that I'll want to go to a 1000.
3. I find Alan Carr funny on his own but not with Justin Lee Collins. I feel the same about Justin Lee Collins.
4. I was a fan of Dallas and Dynasty and The Colbys but my favourite was Falcon Crest.
5. I did not like Knots Landing.
6. I find Paddy McGunniess strangely attractive.
7. I was once told I sound like a gay Frank Skinner.
8. My mother always told me that cards celebrating events should stay for one week. The only exception is Chrsitmas cards which stay up until the 6th January. Our Valentines cards are still up.
9. I do not understand the ending of Donnie Darko but I did enjoy the film.
10. I end up in arguments with friends as I think the best Prime Minister ever was Margaret Thatcher.
11. I am a Royalist but hate Prince Charles.
12. I used to have my cock pierced.
13. I think David Gest is a freak.
14. I would like to learn to play the Xylophone.
15. I have three recurring dreams that I have about four times each a year.
16. Barry Norman once called me a fucking bastard.
17. I have no faith in the British Justice system but don't carte anymore as I don't live there.
18. My dog that lives with my parents was named after Hopeton House in Scotland.
19. I like my steak blue.
20. I think Derek Acorah is a big fake.
21. I can knit.
22. I could play Halo, Fable or Blood Omen over and over again.
23. I thought this film was boring.
24. I have three SLR camera's and prefer the pictures taken on them than a digital but digital is so much more convinient.
25. I used to work for QVC.
26. And Sky.
27. And VH-1.
28. I get very pissed off when a programme is advertised as live ("Live at five on four!") when it's recorded the night before.
29. I was this age when I met Brad.
30. I think I'm the only person in the world who would like to see Noel's House Party return.
31. I believe my grandad came and told me everything was okay two days after he died. I think it's more likely that I was dreaming.
32. I can sign my mothers signature. Even she can't tell the difference.
33. My sign-name (BSL//ISL) is the sign for pink while Brad's is the sign for man!
34. Like Rampage I am the only person in my family who can carry on the family name.
35. Being gay, unlike Rampage, I will not be carrying on the family name.
36. This sometimes upsets me.
37. For Christmas one year I got a set of knee and elbow pads for skate boarding. I didn't own a skateboard and had never tried it so gave them away. In the summer of the following year I began skate boarding and injured myself many times, which wouldn't have happened if I'd have had the pads.
38. I would help anyone with anything if I'm able and get pissed off when others won't help me.
39. I only ever wanted to join the RAF because my Grand-father was in it.
40. I do very loud sneezes and can't help it.
41. I once grew a moustache for a play and ended up looking like Howard from Last of the Summer wine.
42. For my A-level film studies exam we had to compare Robocop and Valdimir Propp's theory of fairy tales. I likened it to Eygpt and the Pharaohs and wrote pages about how they ruled, only mentioning Robocop or Propp once or twice. I got an A.
43. I got so pissed off and bored with my history teacher at school that I lit a cigarette up in the class just to see him get angry. He sent me out the room and I winked and said "I'll bet you feel alive now!"
44. I was an arrogant fucker at school and suspended a number of times but never expelled.
45. I got the cane twice in my first year.
46. The teacher that gave me the cane became head-master of a village primary school, which he got the sack from after pornographic images of little boys was found in his desk drawer.
47. The head of the lower school (11 to 13 year olds) was call Mr. Lunt. We called him Eric.
48. The only thing I can say in German is "My hamster is dead"
49. In Dutch I can say "suck this bitch"
50. My nan asked me to help her die.
51. Brad's friend Ami once told me that she really liked me but if I ever hurt she'd hunt me down and kill me.
52. I'm very proud that one of my oldest friends went on active duty with the Navy during the first Gulf War even though I don't speak to him anymore.
53. As the curtain opened of a play I was in I was supposed to be on the phone talking away. As the curtain came up the cable of the phone got caught in one of the curtain tassels and took the phone up into the air and as it went past it smacked me on the chin. When the curtain stopped the phone dropped and hit the stage so I picked it, shouted "darling it's doing it again!" and then said "sorry about that, now where was I?"
54. I can touch type.
55. I wouldn't make a very good spy because I'd often be over heard whispering saying "Don't tell anyone but I'm a spy!"
56. I used to be a club DJ and only did it because people thought I was cool. I thought I was an arrogant wanker.
57. I used to to hitch-hike all over the country.
58. I once forgot the name of the person I was having sex with.
59. I have slept in a skip.
60. I was a "Founder Member" on BCUK.
61. If I'm hanging out clothes on a washing line with coloured pegs each item of clothing has to have the same coloured pegs. The next item must have a different colour. Socks must only have white pegs.
62. Because of the above I try to only buy wooden pegs.
63. I think Derren Brown is a twat but often find myself watching his programmes.
64. I have been "blogging" since the 16 January 2003 via online sites but have been doing it long in writing.
65. I hate yoghurts with fruit it in but will happily tip the fruity corner of a Muller into my yoghurty corner.
66. Brad proposed to me in Bulgaria by a moonlit swimming pool on August 15th 2006.
67. My favourite food is Chicken Fried Rice.
68. I put ice in my milk. Brad finds this strange.
69. I got my hearing aid on the 27th October 2006. I should have had it long before then but never admitted I was deaf.
70. I can jive, cha-cha, salsa (badly and waltz and tap dance.
71. I can ice-skate but I haven't for years.
72. I once walked around on a broken ankle for three weeks not knowing it was broken.
73. My iPod is laser etched with the words "Landers" and underneath it says "Who's the daddy?" - I am so very ashamed of that.
74. I get excited every morning as I await the arrival of my email.
75. I love to read but do not do enough of it.
76. If I hear screeching breaks I wince.
77. I cried happy tears when I saw Helen in a bridesmaid dress because she looked so beautiful.
78. I wailed happy tears when I saw her in her wedding dress for the same reason.
79. I often wonder why later monarchs have never abolished the Church of England. I'd be ashamed of my heritage.
80. A friend and I went to a fancy dress as Posh & Becks. Her costume comprised of a pair of sunglasses and mine was some beige jeans (with glitter in the material!) and a mohican hair-do. Everyone knew who we were.
81. I think Arnold Schwarzenegger is an awful emotionless actor and his wife is insane.
82. I like to die in my sleep like my grandfather, not kicking and screaming like the passengers in his car.
83. Unless they are allergic to it or have tried it before I think people who won't at least try new food are idiots.
84. So much so that the hairs on the back of my neck stand-up and I feel myself getting angry when people saying "I don't like it" and they haven't even tried it. The same goes for TV programmes they have never watched!
85. I hate Michael Schumacher but respect him and is driving skills.
86. If it didn't sound pretentious or wasn't so expensive I'd drink champagne on nights out.
87. I could spend days walking round art galleries and museums.
88. I think I am a better artist than Hirst or Emin and all the other wasters like them. I just don't have the money or backing or know-how (publicity wise) to create the things I think of.
89. I think in 100 years people will look back at my era and realise that really we listened to, watched, took part in and appreciated a pile of shit! And I'm ashamed that I'll be label as being part of that. Imagine looking back and seeing Big Brother, X-Factor, Emin & Hirst, plays that are spin-off, rip-offs or copies, remade films, auto-biographies by Jade Goody. I shudder when I wonder what my ancestors will think about us.
90. Re-reading that last bit I'm tempted to turn it into an entry on it's own.
91. I don't believe in the phrase that you can't love someone else until you love yourself.
92. I am stubborn in my opinions but I am happy to have my opinion changed on something if someone can convince me otherwise.
93. I believe in reincarnation but I don't believe humans come back as animals. I think we stick to our species and this goes with my feelings on soul groups.
94. It has never been explained sufficiently enough (in my mind anyway) why some people are frightened of me and I'd love to know.
95. I have been up and about for two and half hours now and I've not eaten, had a coffee or rolled a smoke.
96. I empty my e-mail inbox on a weekly basis.
97. I quite often find myself dancing for no reason when there is no music on.
98. I cannot go to sleep without some form of noise... other than snoring!
99. I once swallowed the ball off the top of my tongue bar. I found it and still have it ;)
100. There will not, never, at all, be a 6th list!
